### Locus Titanic Funus: Castus lacrima

#### 29/08/13 || Lord K Philipson

This Russian act with the ridiculous moniker is supposed to play “gothic doom black metal” according to Internet sources. Wow, the expectations… If this does anything but absolutely SUCK IT I will stab myself in the eyes with a hunting knife.

You know what? I won’t have to. This is, as we all expected, terrible. You wanna know why?

Embarrassingly badly programmed drums for one. Or how about the hideous black metal shrieks (or whatever the fuck they’re supposed to be?) on top of retarded, slow riffs (supposed to do the “doom” reference justice, I guess). You also have the soulless female vocals and these synths as if the shit above wasn’t enough already. If you’re lucky (which you are with this band) you also get something I’d guess is Russian lyrics here and there or everywhere. I could be wrong coz it’s not like you can hear what the fucken idiot(s?) is/are singing anyways.

On a positive note – I did hear one 15 second piano part that didn’t absolutely blow. It just blew a little less than the rest of this anus hole disguised as music.

Take all this shit and arrange it into meaningless 8+ minute tunes and you have a recipe for disaster.

Having “Titanic” in their name is very appropriate.

1,5/10: Whoever composed that 15 second piano thing, which saved them from a 1 rating, is prolly not a full-time member of the band.