### Carnal Forge: Aren't you dead yet

#### 09/11/04 || Lord K Philipson

Once again the very nice cocksuckers at Century Media send some albums this way, only bad thing about it is that I have to write shit instead of being drunk. That fucken sucks, but a job is a job.

Sometimes, no… let’s make that “most of the time”, the music business isn’t fucken fair. The Haunted gets mad ravings about their shit everywhere while a band like Carnal Fork (hohoho, someone shoot me) goes by pretty unnoticed, though they are up there as far as quality material goes. Carnal Dork (hihihi… aren’t you dead yet?) are higher on my list of aggro-thrash-bands-de luxe than The Haunted, for example. This is thanx to a few reasons;

1. The groove. Carnal New York grooves, and they even manage to groove in their fast parts, which is a rare thing.

2. The sonic attack of guitarists Jari and Petri is tighter than… something extremely tight. It’s a joy listening to these guys and if they are downpicking all the time, I’m even more impressed. But I don’t think so.

3. Drummer Stefan keeps shit interesting with his precise drumming and flawless fills. Definitely one underrated drummer.

4. I have played with Lars Lindén who’s the band’s bassist. I know for a fact that he’s a good guitarist so it’s quite a suprise he’s handling the bass here, as he most probably would be able to do the guitars.

5. Lars looks like Glen Benton’s lost brother.

6. Vocalist Jonas has a good range with his screams, and for some reason I don’t even get bored with them. He’s out of the band now and I’m not sure if Jens Mortensen (Slapdash) is the man to replace him, but hopefully he’ll prove me wrong.

7. The name Carnal Forge is stolen from a Carcass song. Maybe.

8. The lower backing vocals sound massive. They actually add to the stuff instead of just being there.

See, there are a lot of reasons to dig these fuckers. If you are a fan of the Swedish thrash sound (and Carnal Shrimp improves it a bit by playing their shit slightly faster than your average thrash-band) there’s just no way you should let these guys go by unnoticed. You are fucken retarded if you do. Listen to the opening riff of “My Suicide” – if that doesn’t grab you by the balls, nothing will. Or lemme rephrase that, if that riff don’t floor you I will personally look you up and staple your scrotum to yer living room floor.

Funny thing is that I wasn’t too keen on Carnal Balls the first time I listened to the album. But after numerous listens they have grown on me like warts.

One last thing… I’m willing to bet my left vagina (eh) on the track “Burn Them Alive” originally being written by Lars for either Slapdash or Rosicrucian (pretty much the same band). Most of it sounds so much like something those guys would have done.

Anyway, I’m impressed. I’m even more impressed with how many extremely good jokes I have managed to make about their name.

Almost 8 Carnal Farts out of 10

- Information
- Released: 2004
- Label: Century Media
- Website: www.carnalforge.com
- Band
- Jonas Kjellgren: vocals
- Stefan Westerberg: drums
- Jari Kuusisto: guitar
- Petri Kuusisto: guitar
- Lars Lindén: bass

- Tracklist
- 01. Decades Of Despair
- 02. My Suicide
- 03. Burn Them Alive
- 04. Waiting For Sundown
- 05. Exploding Veins
- 06. Sacred Flame
- 07. Inhuman
- 08. The Final Hour
- 09. Totally Worthless
- 10. The Strength Of Misery