### 2 Ton Predator - Mazza

#### 27/02/04 || Lord K Philipson

Who better than me, the mighty Lord, to make an interview with my friends and colleagues 2 Ton Predator. You should know by now that Mazza, guitarist/crony/Kerry King’s abomination, also plays with The Project Hate MCMXCIX. Yes, my band, the one that dominates all of you. Mazza is one of my closest friends, hell, we have even fucked chicks together. So I’m positive this will be a good laugh for you all. Now, fuck off.

Lord K: Hey Cyklony, how’s it fucken hanging?

Mazza: Mighty fine bro… I love us.

Doesn’t it feel a bit odd that I’m interviewing you seeing I’m the bigger rockstar?

It feels odd, but not cause you’re a bigger rockstar, cause you’re not. But it’s odd because I have this big influence on your life, and I know you’re doing this interview just to get some hints and stuff on the real rockstar lifestyle. I know how badly you wanna be a rockstar, and I know how hard it is to get there… hang in there boy! You’ll make it one day!

I am a full-blown rockstar and you know it, but to cut to the Chevy Chase… Congrats on the new album brother, that’s some mighty fine work you have there. Spill yer guts about it so people get interested in checking out the Predators.

Thanks…! I don’t wanna be all Lord K-ish and shit now… But man, am I satisfied with this new album of ours… It really came out the way we wanted it to, and Tue did an excellent work as usual. I hate to describe music, and I won’t. Lets just say we play motherfucking quality metal, the Örebro way. The album was recorded in Antfarm studios, Aarhus Denmark. We spent about 10 days there, and with such an excellent guy like Tue Madsen to work with, that is all it takes.

I have followed you guys for quite some time and have noticed the changes in yer sound over the years. From being an exact Pantera-copy, you have now turned into an exact Haunted-copy. Would those bands be yer fave-bands of all times? You can list some of the shit that inspired the evolution of the Predator’s sound over the years. Don’t forget to mention Pantera and Haunted first.

Ok, Pantera and Haunted. Seriously, I thought you were a musician… I mean… sure, we use guitars, bass, drums and vocals. And so does Pantera. Yeah, that makes us Pantera Rip-offs. I would probably not play/write on my guitar the way I do now if I’d never heard Pantera, and I think that’s cool. They were a big inspiration back when they released CFH and VDOP… I just loved the way Dime did his guitars, and I love the way they write songs. And of course, our sound has changed over the last 10 years, which I see as a positive thing. You think we’re a Haunted copy? Well, think again. If you tell me songs like “Bone brigade”, “Hammered”, or “Duct tape story” sounds anything like The Haunted, I have to give you cab money to the local asylum. Bands that inspired us through the years… Slayer, Pantera, Metallica, Crowbar, Entombed, Westlife. Don’t get me wrong here, I love The Haunted, but being compared to them all the time cause we’ve been throwing in more fast songs is just boring. When our new album gets out and people get to hear it, I don’t think they’ll go; “Oh my, those guys sounds like The Haunted.”

Did I say you guys sound like Pantera and Haunted? I meant Slayer. You are a Slayer-copy.

If we we’re a Slayer copy, no one would be more proud than me. Slayer is the shit. Ok, they honestly didn’t do much for me since “Seasons…”, but who cares? Reign in blood”? Ring any bells? I mean, people play faster today compared to what Lombardo did back then, but is it FASTER? Is it more “fuck off, I play evil drums.”? Hell no. And Haunted sounds more like Slayer then we do. Ha ha ha…! Fan.

I love you, is that strange?

In one way it is. But in one way it’s not. It’s strange cause I get all the chicks, you have to be a little pissed about that? And I’m way bigger a rockstar than you’ll ever be, you have to be pissed about that too… But on the other hand, I’m a true friend and I love you even though you’re the way you are. So, of course you love me. I love you.

You know, 2 Ton and TPH have played together a few times and I think we’ll continue to do that. What’s the worst part of being in 2 bands that plays the same evening? I can only see good things about it. You get twice the cash, twice the beers and twice the whores.

The beer and money issue is great. I don’t get twice the whores, because I don’t get any whores. You know, if it takes more then 30 seconds to get a girl into bed, I tell them to fuck off. And if you tell girls to fuck off, you probably won’t get any pussy from her in the near future. There are more important things in life then to be nice to girls. Drinking beer and get cash for playing live is just 2 of them. Ha ha ha… Seriously, playing two shows a night isn’t that hard I guess. It’s not like either 2 Ton or TPH does these 3 hours Metallica stadium shows, and playing for 45 + 45 minutes with a break in between isn’t that hard. But I’m a lazy fucker, and we’ll see how good I’ll do if we do more gigs together.

I know you will do excellent but let’s move on… Now that you have joined TPH on a full-member basis, are you going to quit 2 Ton? I really think you should coz I don’t like my members screwing around you know…

The day I quit 2 Ton is when all the girls in Örebro gets together and writes me a love letter, hands it over to me and gives me one blow job each. It won’t happen. I quit 2 Ton the day we all say: “Ok, let’s put this band to rest”. And as things are now, I don’t see that coming. You have to share me Bro. Like we share chicks.

That’s a deal. You 4 guys have been together for a long time without having a change in the line-up. What’s the secret? to a band staying together for so long? Who fights most within the band?

There is no secret. We just like to play together and we know each other and respect each other, and we kinda share the same vision. That sounded pretty gay, but I guess it’s that simple. And when you’ve been playing together for 10 years, you know your place in the band. We all have a function in the band, and we all know what function we have. I don’t like these bands that change line-up’s all the time, I think you lose the “band feeling” when you do that. If one of us left the band, I honestly think that would be the end. It would be weird to replace any of the guys after 10 years.

Some people never heard about you guys, what song from each album would you hand out to them as a “ – Hey coyote-sucker, this is 2 Ton”.

Well, I’d pick a couple from every album then. From “In the shallow waters” I would say that “Still remains” and “Hole in my mind”, Those are the 2 songs I like the most nowadays. “Burned” I cool as well, kinda soft chorus and one heavy main riff going through most of the song. I would say “Burned” is a good example of how we sounded in -95, -96. From “Boogie” I’d say “Boogie”, “Duct tape story” and “Downright evil”. And then it’s “Demon Dealer” from the new one.

I have five words for you: Dark Funeral.

I have one word for you: Kerry King. Dark funeral is the shit when Lord K does the air drumming! Anyone who doesn’t live to witness that shit is one unlucky fucker. Dark funeral is cool.

I must say I think the new album-title “Demon Dealer” is fucken lame. Why didn’t you go with “Transparent venom addiction” as intentionally planned? That sounds enough Meshuggah, Pantera and Haunted.

I don’t know if that was planned. Just because you thought it was a cool title doesn’t mean we have to use it, or does it? ( Oh yes, it so does – The Lord ) Well, it probably does when I think about it. I don’t know, we just wanted to keep things simple. You know, if we’d named it “Transparent Venom Addiction”, people would just ask about that shit all the time. You know, like in interviews and shit… “Hey, what does “Transparent Venom Addiction” stand for? Is there a secret message in there? It sounds like something that could have come from Meshuggah, Pantera and Haunted, did they inspire you to name the album?” I hate shit like that. some people that interview you are more curious about shit like that then they are about the music. And it’s really fucking boring when you get that question for the 23453445:th time. But now we have to go with the “Why did you decide to name your album 2 Ton Predator???” Fuck.

Forum-member *Legion really loves your new album. I love Legion, he sent me a 40 gig hard drive. Is there a special message you wanna hand him? Why do you think he likes it so much? He’s into Katatonia for fucks sake.*

He likes us because he’s a very intelligent, clever, intellectual young boy. He has good taste in music. And I wanna give him a big hug, and a kiss for telling me we rule all the time. He’s into Katatonia, you are into Avrill Levinge or what the fuck her name is. Legion: 1 – Lord K: 0.

What’s up with the worshipping of Kerry King? He never made one good solo.

He never made a good solo? Are you on acid now again? Do you want me to rip down your gay pictures of Peter Forsberg from your walls and feed them to my pony? Kerry is God. He wrote “Piece by piece”, I didn’t. Kerry: 1 – Mazza:0.

I know you have been sitting at yer place while being young, playing Malmsteen stuff and shit. This kinda explains how good you are at guitar. Rate the following guitarists on a scale from 1-10, 10 being the shitnix and 1 being someone who should apply for something else but doing guitars:

Myself: 000.12. Dave Mustaine: 7. John Petrucci: 9. Yngvie Malmsten: 9. Kerry King: 666. Zakk Wylde: 9. Mieszko Talarzcyk: 6. Scott Ian: 6. Kirk Hammett: 7. Leif Edling: 10.

You know that yer site lacks enormously of updates, why is that? It can’t be too fucken hard to actually update at least once a week with something you know. You know, people tend to not come back to a site if shit never gets updated you know? There’s no excuses anymore you know, seeing drummer Matte bought a digital camera recently so get some new photos in there at least. You know what I’m saying? How many “you know” was that?

Well, I know… right now our webmaster has problems with his computer and shit. But we WILL have an update any day now. But seriously, we won’t update if we don’t have anything to say. That’s just lame. We’re not like TPH… :“Go to the site! Big update!!!” And when you go there, it’s like 3 new pics of you and some lame ass power metal band from some crappy festival. Ha ha ha… I love you. I hope we’ll get better on this though.

Who is the main-writer of the material for 2 Ton? Just so we know who to blame for those Haunted and Pantera riffs. Has Matte or vocalist Morgan ever contributed one single riff to a song?

I and Tobbe do all the riffs. Probably because we play the instruments you normally play riffs on. It’s kinda hard for Matte to write a song on the drums… ha ha… But Matte is very involved in the writing in his own way. “Hey Mazza, could you do something like this… Dum-di-dum-dadada-dududud…?” ha ha… I’m like, “like this?” and he goes, “NO!!! Like THIS!!! DUMDUM-DIDI-DUDUDUDUD-DU-RAWSAUPAW!!!” Me, Tobbe and Matte puts everything together in the rehearsal room. Mogge isn’t that involved nowadays, he’s taking care of his animals at the farm! Ha ha ha… But being 3 writers is hard enough sometimes…

Considering you just made one fucken killer-album, don’t you think you deserve something bigger than Diehard Records? I sure do, and it’s not becoz you play with me. What’s the deal like with Diehard? How many albums and so on…

Here in Europe our kinda music isn’t that big. Everybody thinks that because we got all these great bands, but it’s not like that. It’s hard to get a bigger deal then the one we’ve got, all the “major” labels like Nuclear Blast, Century Media and some others already has like 6328763762 bands on their rooster. And I talked to Nuclear blast, they said “Hey, I’m going to be honest here, don’t send any stuff cause we won’t listen to it. we don’t wanna sign anymore bands…”. We have a cool deal with Diehard, we just sign for 1 album at the time. In one way it’s really cool to be on a small label, because we know them and we know they won’t fuck us over or anything… I hope.

Some of the guys in the band drinks pretty good. Who’d win in a drinking-battle between you and Matte? I’m talking amount here. To give you guys a chance at winning something, I’m not participating.

I’d win. Matte would be really drunk after like 5 beers and his eyes turn all Asian and weird. ha ha ha… But he’s a good drinker, he almost never passes out, and he’s there until the very end. Most of the time. You’re a great drinker Crony, but you’re twice my size and you’re not drinking twice as much as me. That’s lame.

I’m impressed with Matte’s drumming on the new one. How much is Pro-Tools involved with that?

Pro-tools is involved with all music you hear nowadays. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad. Matte didn’t “cheat” while doing this record, but it makes it easy to work. I mean, listen to some of the Death metal bands out there today… Oh my… It’s Pro-tools all over. I don’t wanna bash other bands here, so I’ll leave out names. And then everyone is like “I’ve seen them live and he DOES play that stuff live!!!” well, that’s because you don’t listen as close, and you don’t hear the sound like you do in a studio. Pro-tools is great, but don’t overuse it.

Rate the following chicks from 1-10, 10 being fuckable and 1 being fuckable.

Lisette: 100. (She WILL marry me, and you’ll kill me.) Tori Amos: 7. Leif Edling: 10. Britney Spears: 9. Tatu’s redhead: 9. Tatu’s blackhead: 9. Madonna: 8. Christina Aguilera: 7. Jennifer Aniston: 10. Leif Edling: 10. Legion: 10. Leif Edling: 10.

I’m running out of questions here, is that ok?

I don’t know. I’ll ask Leif Edling.

I know you have some problems to play some of the 2 Ton stuff live as Matte has a tendency to speed things up then. Could he join Krisiun? What’s the hardest song to play?

Everyone playing in a band (no, not you K, you use a fucking drum machine) knows how hard it is to not get over energetic when you play live. Matte is the kind of drummer that goes for 110% and just wanna smash things up when he plays. We knows it and he know it, but it’s just hard to remember when you’re up there. The hardest songs to play that way is the slower songs actually, like “Duct tape story”. That one sounds like shit if it’s too fast.

We haven’t really covered that much about 2 Ton in this interview, but don’t you think this interview will really make people checking you guys out?

I think people will start worshipping 2 Ton after reading this. The way I worship Kerry King.

You actually went on tour with Entombed and Cathedral some time ago. How much do you owe the label for that? How did it go, tell us some of the funnier shit that happened…

First off, we don’t owe Diehard, it’s called tour support and comes in handy when you tour… ha ha ha… Being on the tour was really cool because we got along great with the bands. The tour manager was an ass though, and he didn’t like us at all. We were pretty surprised that a lot of people actually knew about us, we didn’t expect that. We had never played outside of Sweden before this tour so that was cool. All in all, I’d say we did good shows, and had pretty good support everywhere. And everyone always told us how hard it was to impress the British audience, so we didn’t have any hopes for those dates… But I remember one show in England when the tour manager came up to me when I got off stage and said, “Hey man, I’ve never seen any opening act get support from this audience before, good job!…” That was cool. We had some cool parties as well, Madrid was a good party… Me and Matte ended up on a fucking whorehouse talking to these young guys from the States. They were all like Stiffler from American pie, and talked about how much pussy they got all the time back in the States… Ha ha ha… I was like, “then what the fuck are you doing here?” We didn’t have any money, so we just hung out there. It’s cool hanging with prostitutes.

What’s happening now with this album you think? What did the 2 others sell? Don’t give me the “we don’t know”- bullshit. Spit it out.

Hopefully this one will do better then the previous ones… which I think is like 2000-3000 each. And it would be cool if we could get some attention in the States as well. I think people over there would like us, Europe is all Power metal nowadays you know… ha ha ha… We really need to get out more and play as well, that feels like the top priority right now. This IS a great album, but just recording it won’t take you anywhere, you have to let people know you exists.

I have 3 words for you. Kerry King.

I have a blotter of acid for you. But it doesn’t seem like you need it.

That pretty much covers it. 2 more questions… How long do you think 2 Ton will last in the scene? What do you guys have that other bands lack?

I’d say we’ll stick around for a while. As long as we can do this, as long as some label wanna give us money to do records, we will do that. And maybe that is what makes us a good band, we honestly like what we do. We’re not into this for the money, cause then we would have quit long time ago.

Brudar kommer och går, men crony´s består. Thank me now and give a few “fuck you“´s to people.

Thank you, my favourite Lord and friend. I love you. Everyone who think they might like our music but never heard us, go to our website which is one of the most updated sites in the world. Download our music, buy our albums, and attend to our shows, and become a real 2 Ton Predator fan. You’ll like it, I swear. Otherwise, go drop some acid and have a nice day.