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Reviews

Amen: Amen

31/05/10  ||  Kampfar

Plastic Hammer, a UK b(i)ased magazine into manure close to exclusively, spent many words and much effort praising Amen back in the days. Hell, at one point they even claimed them to the be the, and I quote: “overall best band in the world”. Wow, that might be the most pretentious shit I read all week. But so it isn’t, because a couple of days ago I read a brochure preaching peace, tolerance, and equality. This crapper I plowed through whilst awaiting my sex-change operation pt. III, which translates to me now being the proud owner of a set of boobies very much akin to those once belonging to a nowadays deceased cunt who named herself Lolo Ferrari. I wonder if her implants had to be removed before they buried her sorry corpse? I think yes.

‘Cause I’ve got nothing
Nothing to bleed in
And you bought a god
Everything is untrue

Amen to that, fuck you all, and so appeared the perfect time to drop the fucks and tell you why the love shown by Metal Dildo wasn’t uncalled for when speaking this orchestra revolving around a dude who found it wise to name himself Casey Chaos. Thanks to Norway alone, that has to be one of the least shitty pseudonyms you ever saw. Talking about Norway, mentioned Mr. Chaos and some Norwegians did an album called “Gospels of the sick”, back in 2005 exactly, and Scum was the moniker it got released under.

“Amen” sounds nigh on fantastic – loud and noisy yet with plenty of room for the ever important detail – and to thank for all this we have a certain guy actually named Ross Robinson. I think. By the way, hitherto is a funny word.

If someone put to a gun to my penis – one hard to miss – and threatened to shot it off if I showed incapable of coming up with a description of what Amen is up to, this in under 20 seconds, here is what I’d say: angst, anger, piss and vinegar, all dressed up in a fitting suit. I’m not entirely sure my fuckstick would’ve survived that description, more snappy than informative perhaps, but please do remember I only had 20 seconds on Edward Penishand.

Go forth and die, humanoid scum.

Now that would’ve been a snappy ending, and all this talk about snappy suddenly made me think of Scnappi. Trust me, if I’d been one of them high ranking imams telling (lots of) Muslims what to do and how to do it, via Al-Jazeera or something, a fatwa very much active would’ve been brought upon every last soul responsible for making “Scnappi, das kleine Krokodil” a hit back in the noughties somewhere.

Now that I’ve had more than 20 seconds to come up with something, here is what I have to say for myself: Amen is punk and metal brought together, this particular mix, if not quite unique, damn sure not a carbon copy of anything I ever heard. And the reason I chose to do a “review” on “Amen” is, unsurprisingly enough, because it happens to be the overall best record Amen did in history. “We’ve come for your parents” isn’t trailing miles behind, “Death before musick” do, but a total stinker the latter ain’t.

There isn’t a song on “Amen” I feel a need to skip, every last one of them sporting bile and energy aplenty, and this translates to boredom not at all being a part of this equation crafted somewhere in California. Fucking hell, even the A-capella version of this album would’ve been more intense, and interesting, than the product of many a band claiming to be oh so extreme. In other words, it wouldn’t at all surprise me if Casey coughed up blood after recording each and every song on here.

Be sure to give this one a go if you aren’t a conform idiot high on serenity.

9

  • Information
  • Released: 1999
  • Label: Roadrunner Records
  • Website: www.officialcaseychaos.com
  • Band
  • Casey Chaos: vocals, guitar, bass
  • Shannon Larkin: drums
  • Tracklist
  • 01. Coma America
  • 02. Down human
  • 03. Drive
  • 04. No cure for the pure
  • 05. When a man dies a woman
  • 06. Unclean
  • 07. I don’t sleep
  • 08. TV womb
  • 09. Private
  • 10. Everything is untrue
  • 11. The last time
  • 12. Fevered
  • 13. Broken design
  • 14. Resignation/naked and violent
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