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# Global Domination

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## Interviews

### Totalt Jävla Mörker - Sylen and Victor

#### 12/12/08 || theProphet

Totalt Jävla Mörker. The fucking kings of the Swedish extreme music scene. If you are not familiar with these guys, check out my two reviews of their shit. After that, you need to check these motherfuckers out. Anyways, when I approached them with this interview, I had in my hopes a tender spooning session, maybe a backrub. With lotion. Little did I expect that this was to turn into a full fledged sandwich gangbang, as both vocalist Sylen and bassist Victor agreed to answer my moronic questions. Turns out that Victor was suffering from some kind of erectile dysfunction though, since his performance is pretty shaky here. Apparently, his real girlfriend Satyricon kept him a little preoccupied. Still, kudos en masse for the guys and a gold star for Sylen who came up with some really impressive answers, even if they were all in Swedish which meant some massive translation work for yours truly. Anyone interested in the original Swedish answers from Sylen can contact me through the site. Fuck, this was a seriously long intro for an interview… I shall stall no longer, onwards!

First of all, thanks for doing this interview, and welcome to the mighty Global Domination! I presume that you are familiar with the work here, so why don’t you tell everyone which five reviews you like best?

Sylen: I’ve never checked GD out, so I’m not that familiar with the whole thing, actually. I guess it’s just a bunch of metal and stuff, right? The closest to metal I get is Iron Maiden and Norwegian black metal. I’ve got some friends who tend to peruse the site, and they’ve told me some stuff about it, but I don’t know what “five reviews” you speak of.

Victor: Well you have alot of nice ones.

Right, so we move onwards. First of all, your name is Swedish for “Total Fucking Darkness”, did you take this from the Cradle of Filth demo, or is it purely coincidental? In any case, why did you choose it?

Victor: No, we did not. It’s a cool name and we’re a cool band.

Sylen: I’ve never listened to CoF, not my bag of music. I don’t know the entire history behind the bandname since it was way before my time, but rumor has it that it was Tompa (guitars) who came up with the name after a long, wet night in dark Skellefteå.

By the way, all of your album covers pretty much rule, except the one for “Industri, betong och sålda själar”, who are responsible for these? Is it the same person? Is the band involved?

Sylen: The band’s influence on the album covers is pretty much that we give some thoughts and input on how we want it to look. If I remember it right it’s probably Däny at Communichaos who did the cover for “IBOSS”, he also made the cover for “Det ofrivilliga lidandets maskineri”. I’m think it’s Däny who has drawn our logo as well. The cover for the first 7” was made by the band itself, I think. For “Människans ringa värde” and the split 7” we did with Human Waste the covers were made by an old childhood friend (Kenny) of the band from Skellefteå. He has also made some t-shirt design (the latest, among others). For our latest self-titled album, the cover was made by a Dane who went by the name of Frode. If I’m not mistaken he has also made covers for Haunted (or was it In Flames?) and some other metal bands. So we have worked with a couple of different people over the years, it’s always fun to get some variation, since everybody has their own style, kinda. Personally I think I like Kenny’s work best. Dark and evil, just like it’s supposed to be…

You’re from Norrland so obviously you spend a lot of time on snowmobiles. Please share some outrageous snowmobile story with us! We know you have loads.

Sylen: Why’s that so obvious? Do you think, like everyone else from the south, that there are polar bears on our streets as well, or what? I’ve never owned a snowmobile, it’s only spoiled brats that have those standing in the garage. I stole a snowmobile once at a party, I was pretty hammered so I didn’t get very far before crashing into a tree. The snowmobile was turned into scrap, I got away with a couple of bruises and sore limbs. I was charged and fined for DUI and theft and I also had to pay some fucking insurance and damages to the owner.

Victor: I’ve never had the pleasure of trying one actually.

On a side note, do you like it when mankind is “humbled” by stuff such as natural disasters or terrorist attacks? Personally, I kinda like it when humanity is taken down a peg or when people have to look over their shoulder every once in a while. Not when it happens to myself though, I want to be safe by my TV set.

Sylen: Well yeah, it’s pretty easy to sit in your cozy home and watch while others fall victim to our western big brother. Take September 11th for example, I think it served the US right as a power hungry country, and that it was pretty sweet that somebody finally dared to strike back. Unfortunately, it was mainly innocents that had to face death. If those behind the attacks had targeted places such as the White House and similar places of power, then I would have cheered gleefully. After 9/11 the whole world was supposed to have a moment of silence for poor old USA, yet when they bomb and kill thousands of people it should just be swept under the carpet and we should refrain from talking about the damage they’ve caused. I just mean that we should always feel so fucking sorry for the US all the time, but there’s never anyone questioning their politics and how they’re treating other countries. Like the saying goes: you reap what you sow.

Lyrically, you guys end to have a pretty broad range of topics, everything from the war in Iraq to night club bouncers. Don’t you think that it might hurt your credibility just a wee bit when you change from political agitator to bitching Swede between two songs?

Victor: We write what we feel, what we wanna express. We’ve never thought about what other people might think about that. That would be a very strange way to approach material for us.

Sylen: My idea is that you should write lyrics that concern yourself. Personally, I write lyrics in the shape of therapy, so usually it’s pretty private stuff. If you go around thinking about what is credible or not, you’ll probably go insane. Our next album will deal more with emotions than political issues.

Continuing on the topic of lyrics, in your best song, “PK – Poliskonstapel”, the lyrics deal with preconceptions and “codes” within groups that want to seem unbiased. Do you encounter this way of thinking often? Like metalheads saying the most important thing is to be oneself and then not letting people have, say, short hair? Comment!

Sylen: Dude, there’s probably not a single group of people as narrow-minded as punks. People like to present themselves as open-minded and prejudice-free but at the same time they make rules for what to do and not do. I think it’s a bit self-contradictory, punk is supposed to be anything but following any standards and invisible rules. If I feel like eating meat, watching porn and boozing, it doesn’t make me a worse person, does it? It feels like the PC police always knows best. They sit on their pedestals and present themselves as the perfect human being. It was pretty comical some year ago, we heard from a friend that he’d heard some PC scum say that I wasn’t punk anymore cause I stopped wearing my studded vest and wore Adidas pants at home. I don’t give a shit about that, people can call me whatever the fuck they like, see if I care if I’m considered punk in their eyes or not. They can go to hell, I do whatever the fuck I want. I also had an Eddie Meduza t-shirt when we played live once, and there was some hassle after we’d finished. They must have pretty boring lives if they have to get involved in others’ all the time, let them have it…

Victor: Alot of metalheads have short hair these days. I think it has alot to do with self-esteem and taste.

Are you a big conspiracy nerd by the way? Have you seen the movie JFK?.

Victor: No. Yes.

Sylen: I love conspiracy theories! And yes, I’ve seen JFK and a million of other, similar movies and documentaries

JFK got shot, you know. Is this a treatment you would recommend for politicians in general, or do you think that they are actually trying to do some good? Which ones get the TJM votes?

Sylen: Like Pst Q said: “Så mot vilken bakgrundsfakta kan min blankröst skändas?
inget har förändrats och bara för att trösta mig en smula, sprider jag ränker och tänker hädanefter rösta med en kula”.

(GD note: The quote is not really possible to translate, since it rhymes and shit. But the main point is that politicians do indeed deserve a bullet in their corrupt brains.)

Are you a big movie fan anyways? Which was the last movie you saw that you really loved, and which one did you really hate? Who’s your favourite director?

Victor: I’m a music fan. Big time. I prefer Zombie-films.

Sylen: I watch such an insane amount of movies that I nowadays often mistake them for each other. I can’t think of any single great movie like that off the top of my head. Last time I was up in Umeå we went out and saw “Låt den rätte komma in”, it was pretty sweet. I was raised on horror and splatter flicks, so Peter Jackson was somewhat of a domestic deity with his “Braindead” and “Bad Taste”. More recently and in a broader perspective I’ll have to say Quentin Tarantino.

As I’m writing these awesome questions, I haven’t gotten laid in quite a while (you can tell?!). This brings me to my next question: What kind of porn are you into? What is the sickest/weirdest thing you ever saw? Is icicle porn big in Norrland? I’m from Scania and we have so called “bedeporr” (translates roughly to “turnip porn”) as well as some eel porn when it is season.

Sylen: We’ve actually had this discussion within the band once. Watch whatever you want, I won’t judge anybody, but leave me out of it. I’ve got it made, and I’ve never been in a position where I had to buy any porn magazines or movies. Sure, it was cool when you found a couple of “Fibban” (edit: classic Swedish porno mag) back when you were in junior high. Still, I’m more into the real deal than superficial fake moans and underpaid actors being forced to humiliate themselves to provide for their drug use. I know that it isn’t like this in every case, but the main part of the porn industry is probably pretty fucking sordid.

How about drugs, do you think smoking pot should be legal in every country? Or perhaps all drugs? Why/why not? Any crazy drug-related stories?

Sylen: I’d smoke and take a bunch of drugs during my youth. It all ended with me getting a psychosis and had to be admitted to a hospital. One of my best friends who I used to sit around smoking pot and sniffing with laid himself on the railroad tracks and killed himself, some are doing time and others are locked away at asylums scratching the crooks of their arms. I could write a book about drug-related stories, but looking back at it today I don’t think it’s as funny as it was back then. I don’t think it’s that cool with drugs because I’ve seen far too many friends disappear because of it. I do think we should legalize stuff that comes from nature, though, because it should be every individual’s right to decide what to do with your own body. The thing about drugs is that it’s illegal, so it automatically gets more exciting to try. That’s how me and my friends started. You had to do everything illegal. If you erase the laws and stuff then you’ll see that whatever people find exciting about drugs will disappear. Today I only take sedatives for medicinal purposes. I can’t stand big crowds and people I don’t know, I’m still pretty paranoid and get the feeling that I’m being watched or followed, so occasionally I have to pop a few pills to calm my nerves. My doctors say it’s a side-effect from my previous addiction.

How do you create your music? Is everyone involved in both music and lyrics, and really, do you have any real musical skills whatsoever?

Sylen: Musically it’s Tompa and Victor who contributes with the most. They show us their songs/riffs and then we work them over during rehearsals and everyone gets to speak their mind about the song and its structure. I don’t know what it was like before I joined the band as a vocalist, but I think that Fredrik is the one who has written the most. I’ve written some stuff lately, but I think that it’s going to be mainly Freddan’s lyrics that will be on the next recording.

Victor: I write most of my material at home. And then I present it to the rest of the band. The entire band is very involved in the creating process. Me and Chrille have been in alot of different music-schools. (Chrille still is. Akademinska Musikhögskolan in Stockholm.) I have about seven years of music-school. I practice from 3-12 hours a day. Depends on how much time I have.

Also, what kind of music are you the most into? Do all band members like the same bands and genres? Are there any fave bands that might come as a surprise to the public? In that case, mention them, please.

Victor: Extreme Metal, Jazz etc. No.

Sylen: It’s all different periods for me when it comes to music. I’m quite an omnivore with my roots in heavy metal and then mainly punk during middle school. Something that may come as a surprise is that I listen quite often to old rock bands like Dire Straits, AC/DC, Creedence etc. I also listen quite a lot to gangsta rap and reggae. But in the end I always come back to some album with D-beat. Fuck, there’s nothing better than D-beat and over-distorted “jappe-crust”.

Do you think that all music should be political? No bullshit about how all music is political because it in some way reflects the current values and opinions within a society. Don’t you ever get an urge to just sing about zombies?

Victor: No.

Sylen: I prefer personal lyrics, things you can relate to. Yet everything is politics, but in different forms. I got my hands on a couple of a recordings by an artist called El Parador a couple of weeks ago, the lyrics are insanely exposing, private and simply written, to the point where you get goosebumps. Martyrdöd writes fucking awesome lyrics as well.

Have you seen the video of Atari Teenage Riot’s concert during a demonstration in Germany? What do you think of playing a show like that, are you just waiting to hear from ANTIFA or are you just not interested? Have you perhaps already done it?

Victor: No.

Sylen: I haven’t seen that video, though it seems pretty wicked. I’d easily play a gig like that if we were asked. I did some hip hop on the mic during a “Reclaim the Streets” party in Östersund. It wasn’t like the Gothenburg Riots or anything, but it was pretty sweet play a little live, smack in the middle of it.

Do you enjoy a little violence at your shows? Just how far is today’s youth prepared to go when being told to do stuff by some guy on a stage? Which country has the best and/or most violent crowd?

Sylen: The only violence at out shows is that we hurt ourselves. When we played in Sundsvall me and Victor had been bitching a little at each other before going onstage. I didn’t think much about it until Victor hit my forehead with his bass in the middle of the show. The wound he made was spurting blood, but it was a good show in terms of entertainment. Immediately after the show I was pretty exhausted and had lost some blood so I had to take a cab to the hospital straight away. In Örebro I struck out a tooth with the mic because I was so fucking pissed at the audience. It was an expensive affair, nothing I’d recommend. I don’t encourage the crowd to do anything other than overthrow the government and mosh like pigs. The Finns are good as fuck at rocking out and boozing…

Victor: For me, Mexico and Russia have been the most violent so far.

What does a TJM tour look like anyway? You probably wake up and do a line of coke off some groupie’s ass before the actual partying and general rock star lifestyle continues, am I right?

Victor: Yes.

Sylen: Our lives are shit when we’re on tour, no kidding. The money we earn goes to paying for all the trashed hotel rooms. The fun part about being on the road is playing gig, the other 23 hours every day are mostly anxiety and shit.

If you had to choose, who would you kill; Mahatma Ghandi, Martin Luther King or a plain middle aged woman who is innocent, but won’t ever do anything that “matters” on a larger scale? Needless to say, the killings of Ghandi and King would have to take place before they were actually killed in real life, you can’t kill them again. Also, motivate your answer.

Sylen: Humanity is the root of all evil on earth so as far as I’m concerned it doesn’t matter if you’d fucking annihilate they whole planet.

Thinking about it, what do you think is most characteristic of being human, good or evil? Do you think that humanity produces more Josef Fritzls than Mother Theresas? Which occurrence is most in order with human behaviour, a murder or sacrifice of ones life for another’s? What do you think most people would be interested in witnessing, an execution or a birth? How stupid is this question?

Sylen: I don’t really understand the question, but if I got to witness an execution or a birth I’d rather see the end than the beginning.

I’d also like to plug one of them useless but oh-such-a-riveting-read “questions” where you rate and comment on some different bands. The scale is 0 for THE SUCK, and all the way up to 1 for THE SHIT, you are allowed to use decimals, but no fractions.

(GD note: Apparently, only Sylen saw it fit to answer these)

Black Flag – 0,5
Old Darkthrone – 1
New Darkthrone – 1
Skitsystem – 1
Shining – 1
De Lyckliga Kompisarna – 1
Nasum – 0,5
Motörhead – 0,5
Slayer – 0,5
Skitliv – 0,5
Old Disfear – 1
New Disfear – 0,5
Napalm Death – 0,5

The interview is coming to a close, so I’ll take this opportunity to ask you what the future have in store for TJM? Your website says you are working on new music at the moment, will we see a release this year? Any nice surprises?

Victor: Yeah, probably.

Sylen: It’s nothing official yet, but we’re working on some new songs. There’s a risk that we might release a new album or something next year. Perhaps some tours on top of that and then we’ll see what happens. There will be some sweet surprises anyway, you’ll see.

That’s my final question! Thanks for taking the time and creating that awesome music that you do. Do you have any wisdoms that you wish to impart upon the Global Domination readers? I’ll leave it to you to wrap it all up.

Victor: Thank you.

Sylen: It’s not that I’m mentally ill in any way, it’s just that I don’t wanna do this anymore. See you in hell!

Interviews

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