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# Global Domination

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## Reviews

### Judas Priest: Turbo

#### 11/02/11 || sly

1986: Groups like Ratt, Motley Crüe, and Twisted Sister dominate the airwaves. Poison is nearing the completion of “Look what the cat dragged in”. In attempt to make a name for themselves in the rock industry cartloads of men dress like sexy yet vaguely masculine women, for this is the secret pleasure of the white, pubescent, suburban lad. The rebellion-hungry teens buy each record, attend every show, and ultimately transform once mere mortals into cross-dressing gods of rock and roll.

Judas Priest had already released nine records. Their reputation spread across the ocean and permeated the American market (as well as the PMRC’s Filthy 15) with a handful of well-known hits. They’d evolved into a nicely-oiled money-making machine, touring relentlessly and overstuffing large venues. Probably aside from “Point of entry”, Judas Priest had accumulated a fairly impressive back catalogue of albums, and were laudably respected within the metal community. The “Defenders of the faith” tour proved that the guys were playing at (mostly) full capacity, and their existing fans loved them. But, despite this enviable fame, they weren’t getting any bigger and the fanbase was not much expanding; they were at a standstill.

In a time when restrained, conscience-friendly hard rock was edging out wild and dangerous heavy metal, we were given “Turbo”. No wonder this album created such partition. (And continues to do so today!)

“Turbo” can be amply summarized by the opening track: a dancefloor-accessible mid tempo rocker complete with synthetic beats, basic guitars, an anthemic chorus, and imbecilic lyrics referencing sex and race cars. Yet it remains an efficacious track which refuses to vacate the brain.

Among the top tunes on here are “Private property”, “Wild nights, hot & crazy days”, and “Reckless”. Halford continues to show vocalists far and wide how it’s really done, and Tipton and Downing lay hook after hook, complemented with minimal yet breathtakingly perfect soloing. “Parental guidance” and “Rock all around the world” show us that Priest can be more ridiculous than the Scorpions and make Twisted Sister come off like philosophers. Rounding off the rest of the album are standard Priest pieces, “Locked in” and “Hot for love”, the latter possessing an excellent solo.

The production is rather odd. “Turbo” was recorded entirely digitally, with considerable use of synth guitars. The drums sound awfully like a drum machine, and there are even some vocoder-ish type vocals. It is truly a prime example of ’80s musical engineering: robotic, precise, minimal, soulless.

Did I mention imbecilic lyrics? Not that Priest lyrics were ever complex works of art, but these are seriously dumbed down. Startlingly silly plots revolving around sex, authority, and partying to which every moronic 14-year-old boy can relate. For example:

I can’t stand the way you move it
You drive me crazy with that walk
You get me so excited
I tremble and shake
When you make the moves you make

You’ve got the key, the key to my heart
Go ahead and use it, drag me in, slam the door
Then I’ll be yours for evermore

I can’t take it when you touch me
Feels so good I could explode
You’ve got me in a frenzy
I tremble and I quake
When you shake the things you shake.

Crowning material for the Gene Simmons Poetry Corner, guest-hosted by Klaus Meine.

Yes, the Judas Priest of yore was dead and buried by the time we saw “Turbo”. The band was even exchanging their leather for permed and feathered hair. They sold out. Neither fans nor critics cared much for this new sound, and it took a while for the group to realize the error of their way.

Nonetheless Judas Priest still managed to create a very decent hard rock/glam album which put bands such as Quiet Riot, Rough Cutt, and countless others to shame.

Call it an error of appreciation or whatever you will, but without “Turbo” (and the successive hit and miss “Ram it down”) there would have been no “Painkiller”.

- Information
- Released: 1986
- Label: CBS Records
- Website: www.judaspriest.com
- Band
- Rob Halford: vocals
- Glenn Tipton: guitar
- K.K. Downing: guitar
- Ian Hill: bass
- Dave Holland: drums

- Tracklist
- 01. Turbo Lover
- 02. Locked In
- 03. Private Property
- 04. Parental Guidance
- 05. Rock You All Around the World
- 06. Out in the Cold
- 07. Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days
- 08. Hot For Love
- 09. Reckless

Reviews

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