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# Global Domination

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- S(crap)s: I Miss My Death / Kaoskult / Raus & Perunwit (split) / Spatial / Thy Flesh (13/06/14)
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## Witnessed

### Iron Maiden, Dream Theater: 2010-03-20

#### 30/07/10 || InquisitorGeneralis

Who: Iron Maiden and Dream Theater – The Final Frontier Tour.
When: 20-03-2010.
Where: Jiffy Lube Live (formerly Nissan Pavilion); Bristow, Virginia, USA.

I have been waiting to see Iron Maiden since they finished the last fucking note of “Hallowed be thy name” way back in June of 2008 at the “Somewhere Back in Time Tour”. That epic performance turned me into a solid Maiden fan. I now own the entire Maiden discography and force almost everyone who comes over my house for a party or other social gathering (i.e blunt smoking) to watch my “Live After Death” or “Flight 666” DVD’s. I have converted many a Baltimoron into liking Maiden with the powerful triple combo of booze, weed, and said DVD’s being shown on my 61 Inch TV. Back in ’08 Maiden played the decaying yet much closer Merriweather Post Pavilion which is only twenty minutes away from Inquisition HQ.

My spot on the lawn for most of the show, although I did sneak down a few times to snag some closer pics.

This time around, they were coming to the much detested, far away, traffic congested, and poorly planned Jiffy Lube Live (formerly the Nissan Pavilion) in Northern Virginia. Mi amigo Chuck, formerly of stoner masters Trephine and current manager of The Ottobar where I DJ, realized that there were enough Maidenheads around to probably fill a bus to take down to the show. So, we got a mutherfucken charter bus to drive us the eighty or so congested miles from Baltimore through Washington D.C. and into Virginia. The cost worked out to 30 bucks a head plus the bar chipped in a copious amount of free beer for the bus riders. Combine that with a lawn seats that also only cost 30 clams and you have a discount trip to see one of the best metal bands in the world live with no worries about drunk driving. Sign me up! The black dude in the picture? That was our bus driver… George Foreman! No, not really. His name was Louis Patton, but he was cool as fucken hell. He expertly navigated the crowded highways that link and ring B-More and D.C. which is kind of like driving the tractor trailer in the last scene of “Mad Max”. He said nothing about our generally moronic and slightly illegal behavior on his rig. Cheers Louis, you fucken rule. I rooted for your ass during the “Rumble in the Jungle” and your grills helped get me through college.

On the bus the assembled Ottobar crew consumed about 1, 500 National Bohemian beers along with a few bottles of bum wine. There we also faint hints of Whacky Tobaccy smoke emanating from the the bathroom at somewhat regular intervals. We literally sat in traffic for two and a half hours in the pouring rain but no one seemed to mind because we were partying our asses off! Getting this bus goes up there with rubbing two sticks together for fire and slicing bread as the greatest ideas ever in human history. Anyway, by the time we got there it had stopped raining… and Dream Theater had stopped playing. A sign from above in the form of a beautiful rainbow told the world that The Ottobar bus and crew had arrived to dominate Jiffy Lube Live. The photo to the right is me, wasted, basking in this glorious moment. Did I mention we drank a ton of beer on the way down? Anywho, missing Fabio Labrie and the Dreamers caused no major displeasure for our merry band. I would have like to have seen DT play “As I am” and “Home” but I had already seen the Progmen twice before so no tears were shit over us getting there late. We were drunk as fuck by this time, as you can see in the group photo below.

We took our places on the lawn, grabbed a few wildly-overpriced but huge cans of beer, and began to wait for the legendary Brits to take the stage. Being a bit of an Internerd I had already become well aware that Maiden was going to serve up a set consisting primarily of shit from “Brave New World”, “Dance of Death”, and “A Matter of Life and Death”. With this, I had no fucken problems because I enjoy the newer shit quite a bit and even though this was my third Maiden rodeo I have never heard a single song from those three newest records performed live. So to all the weepy vaginas out there who were hoping to hear “The loneliness of the long distance runner” or “Seventh son of a seventh son” I say this: tough fucken shit. Go cry to mommy, you still live with her anyway! Maiden’s new shit is good and the band stands behind it, so I gotta respect that. Besides, after they are done touring for “The Final Frontier” you know there is going to be some big-time throwback tour anyway. Anyway, after about thirty minutes or so the lights went down, the intro tape started, and things got down to business!

Personally, I liked the stage from the tour two summers ago a bit more, but the futuristic set and background was pretty cool.

“The wicker man” from “Brave New World” opened things up and got a good reaction from the crowd. It is far from my favorite song on that record but its chorus makes for a nice chant. I have read about some dead crowds on this tour due to the setlist, but not tonight. Being the last night of the tour, I think people had time to familiarize themselves with the songs they had not really heard before. I know for me personally I went out and bought “Dance of Death” in preparation for this. More on that later. “Ghost of the navigator” was next and was really the start of the awesomeness for me. I like that song quite a bit and the rising intro sounds pretty fucking awesome live. Bruce sounded good and was his usual spastic, hyper self on stage. The first two “Brave New World” tracks got the show started on solid footing and it was good to see that the assembled metalheads at Jiffy Lube Live (awful fucking name right?) knew more Maiden tracks than just “Run to the hills” and “The trooper”!

Scream for me Jiffy Lube!!!

“Wrathchild” was a clear attempt to hook the old-school fans early and again, while not anywhere close to my favorite classic Maiden song, it was something I had never heard live and I was definitely shouting I’m a… wrathchild!!! along with Bruce at the top of my smoke-colored lungs. I took a beer and piss break during “El dorado”. Not because I hate the song, I just have not taken the time to listen to the free mp3/download thingamajig. I will definitely check out “The Final Frontier” when it is released. I just made a tactical decision to get another 24oz can of Icehouse and drain the snake now before the heavy hitter songs came up later. Apparently, “Dance of death” and “Passchendale” were alternating nights on the tour and we got the former. I like the World War I epic a bit more but “Dance…” was performed well and got a huge reaction from the crowd, which was a pleasant surprise. So far, so fucken good I must admit.

This was one of the backdrops to a “Dance of Death” song, but fuck me if I remember which!

Next up was the two-song contingent from “A Matter of Life and Death”, my least favorite of the 2000’s records. I don’t hate it, not at all. It just drags a bit for me and I usually listen to one or two songs at a time, never the whole thing through. “The reincarnation of Benjamin Breeg” was first and the killer lead riff sounded great live. Murray, Smith, and the much-hated Gers are an incredible trio live, and it is funny how each one has their own distinct presence. Dave smiles like a clown on acid and looks as happy a kid in a candy store. Adrian makes love to his guitar and seems very intense while Janick plays which his axe like ex-staffer Smalley plays with his dick on a Friday night. Steve Harris performed his tried and true routine of singing along with the crowd and shooting at us with his bass guitar to perfection.

The guitar gods from Maiden. And Gers. Need I fucken say more?

Anyway, “Breeg” was cool but “These colors don’t run” got a much better response from the crowd due to the more accessible, chantable chorus methinks. Personally, I would have like to have gotten “For the greater good of God” but I think that would have been just a bit too long and epic. Speaking of long and epic, Maiden tossed in “Blood brothers” next. This was the slowest moment of the show for me. I like “Blood brothers” but if I would have much rather heard “The Mercenary” or something a bit more up-tempo. Still, the middle section and guitar solos were great and I certainly wasn’t unhappy. I would not say the crowd was out of it at this point but the enthusiasm level had certainly dropped since the beginning. That should would change quickly though.

Bruce and Steve are a classic pair on stage and both really fire up the crowd!

Let me just say that up to this point the show was pretty damn good, but from here on after it fucking killed! As previously mentioned, I had just become familiar with “Dance of Death” material and I think it is the strongest album they have done since Bruce returned. “Wildest dreams” was just what I and the rest of the crowd needed to get really fired up. The band got back into rocking mode with no problems. By this point, I was completely wasted and forcing all those around me, both familiar and stranger, to sing the brotastic chorus “I’m on my way, out on my own again!!!” with me. While its chorus gets annoying, “No more lies” fucken rawked and the crowd was definitely back in the palm of Bruce’s hand. It was similar to two years ago when everyone from the pit to the grass was singing along to “Heaven can wait”. Maybe you have noticed that I have refrained some saying all the 80’s songs I would have liked to have heard by now. I must admit though, I would have loved to have heard that one again. “Brave new world” was the last of the newer songs and definitely a track I was excited to hear live. Again, the masses sang along almost the whole time and you could tell everyone was getting ready for the bunch of classic material that would surely end the show.

The backdrop during “Brave new world” which looked cool as fucken hell!

As soon as “Fear of the dark” started the place went ape-shit. I know people say that this is a weak song from a weak album and they are tired of hearing it live. Those people should be stripped, raped, and strangled. No song, save for one of the encores, got as much participation and enthusiasm from the fans. I freely admit I was singing the soft-but-awesome guitar lines that make up the song’s introduction. It also warmed my heart to see Mrs. Generalis rocking out too: constant Maiden exposure has made her a fan and “Fear of the dark” is her favorite track. My prospects for scoring some drunken sex later rose along with the crowds chants. “Fear of the dark’ was awesome and maybe the highlight of the show for me. The expected closer “Iron maiden” came on along with the new, alien Eddie. It was not as big as previous ones I had seen but seemed to move a bit more fluid and was playing a guitar. The “Somewhere in Time” Eddie with the laser gun was a lot cooler but at this point I was nearing Joe Namath levels of drunkenness and I enjoyed every moment the monster was on stage battling the guitarists. Due to lessening security throughout the course of the show I was able to sneak down close for “Iron maiden” and snag the following image…

Why do space monsters always go for the nice guys first? Dave probably offered him a cup of tea and a biscuit!

Encores? You betcha! “The number of the beast” was a great choice to go first. The classic spoken word intro got everyone right back into things. This is what I am sure many in the crowd were waiting for and the place exploded when the pace quickened up with after Bruce’s iconic YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! “Hallowed be thy name” was also amazing and again the crowd lost their shit for it. Now, I know you are probably thinking about twenty other Maiden songs that would have made a better encore (“Revelations”, “Moonchild”, “2 Minutes to midnights”, “Wasted years”, etc etc) and I may agree with you. But, in the heat of the booze-soaked moment, these two classic cuts from “The Number of Beast” were great and I didn’t see or hear one person complain. I was too busy hooting like a masturbating ape and rocking out in the muddy lawn. “Running free” was the band’s finishing move. Not my first pick for a song to close a show as excellent of this, but I am just a penniless Internet blogger and Maiden are international superstar millionaires – so what the fuck do I know? I must admit, I loved when the band broke things down in the middle of the song and introduced each member with their own “Running free” chorus. Bruce is a great front man (duh!) and kept his ramblings to a minimum. He said something about coming back again and trying to make “The Final Frontier” debut at #1.

Smoke, flames, spastic gyrations??? Must be the encore!

Well, that’s it duders and dudettes. What more can I say? The show was great, the band’s performance and sound was top-notch, and the crowd was definitely into both the new and old material. Me, Mrs. Generalis, and my other two amigos were well prepared for the ride home with cold Gatorade and Subway sandwiches we had purchased before the show. After scarfing those down we all promptly fell asleep and magically woke-up an hour and a half later at home! Did I say how good of an idea that bus was?

Overall, the show gets 10 Screams for Me’s out of 10 Jiffy Lube lives because we all had a great fucken time. Hopefully, I won’t have to wait two years more years to see Iron Maiden again. Up the irons bitches!

Mrs. Generalis, The Inquisitor, and my homies Derek and Chris saying good night and rock on Global Domination!

Setlist:
The Wicker Man
Ghost Of The Navigator
Wrathchild
El Dorado
Dance Of Death
The Reincarnation Of Benjamin Breeg
These Colours Don’t Run
Blood Brothers
Wildest Dreams
No More Lies
Brave New World
Fear Of The Dark
Iron Maiden
The Number of the Beast
Hallowed Be Thy Name
Running Free

Witnessed

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